The stars are beautiful tonight, the air is crystal clear, the breeze bites ever so slightly and the silence of winter seems to fit the night—maybe because it’s fitting with my life right now.
I didn’t sleep well again last night so after dropping off around 3:30a I stayed in bed until mid-morning . . . which means I worked into the evening. I clocked out around 8:00p and promptly sat down to watch a movie and finish my sisters’ Christmas gifts. Now that’s accomplished and I feel very satisfied with what I did today.
My roommate and I have quite exhausted our small collection of movies so I’m dying to get my hands on “You’ve Got Mail,” or more preferably, “The Shop around the Corner” and “Roman Holiday.” I’ll be checking for each of these movies at the library very soon.
Any movie with Audrey Hepburn is pretty much my favorite, besides “Robin and Marian” (the ending is awful and Disney made a much better version). I admire and appreciate her grace, femininity, character, and beauty—inside and out.
This evening, as I stood in my kitchen polishing copper pans and pots for a lady I’m working for, my thoughts turned once again to my future. What will it be? How long will it be? Even next summer is a giant question mark for me right now. I have ideas, I have hopes but I hardly have plans. It’s not too hard to take a day at a time and see where things lead but then I wonder where yesterday went, and last month, and how could it nearly be New Years? What have I done with the time I’ve been given? I don’t want to fritter my time away waiting for some glorious ideal. What if my time is almost up? No, don’t say that’s an awful thing to say or think. Shouldn’t we all be saying it? Let’s not waste our days. I want to wake up each day supremely grateful for life. All too often aren’t we only thankful for our lives when they’re nearly ripped from our hands?
I really enjoy living in Colorado. The mountains are beautiful, especially under the soft snow of December but I don’t think their beauty could make me stay. I am looking forward to my trip back to Nebraska this weekend like none other and I am pretty sure I will move back near my family next year. It’s hard to decide though, now I have friends in both places who all want me to live near them and I do love my little apartment here by the mountains.