This morning on my way to work I had a Christian radio station playing and I heard the verses: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” (Provers 3:5-6) I’ve heard these words so many times it’s easy to become distracted when hearing them and not think about their meaning. It really hit me today though, that if we trust in the Lord, and acknowledge him in our living and decision making, it’s not that he’ll reveal to us his vast eternal plan or show us the yellow brick road on a map, but he’ll show us in the moment–when we need it–where the straight and narrow path leads. One step at a time. That’s what he gives, and that’s all we need. If we could see farther down the road, then trust would no longer be needed. I’m glad for that reminder this week because a decision I made last weekend dramatically shifted what I’d thought, through the past several months, my next several months could potentially look like. It wasn’t just a small shift, this was either the possible opportunity to be married or remain single in the near future. I chose the latter. And it was as if someone turned off a light. No longer could I see where my future would lead ( but in reality I never know, only Jesus does, I just feel like I do at times).
Well, summer is winding down. The sweet corn will be finished in a few days, the pears will be harvested and canned, the peaches piled in the kitchen are slowly disappearing (what a treat to have in the summer!), and the cornfields will soon be drying out and turning golden yellow. Even though all these yearly summer signs are happening as they always do when fall approaches, something is different this year… no one in my family is heading off to school in the fall. It’s a new phase for our family, and I think we all like it. I sometime miss the days of elementary school though; my sisters and I were home schooled and we really enjoyed it, especially those beginning grades. It was great in the wintertime when we could cozy around a fire and read books together, then grab a mugful of hot chocolate to sip at when we returned to our desks.
With September approaching my older sister and her husband have made so much progress on their old farmhouse that it looks like a totally new house from the outside and it’s looking beautifully new on the inside too! They’re diligently working on project after project to have it in neat orderly shape for their new arrival. My first niece or nephew is due a month from today… so really he/she could come anytime! You wouldn’t believe how much I’m looking forward to meeting this little one and seeing him/her grow up! It will be such fun to have a child around in our family. I keep thinking of Christmas, I’m sure the best gift will be the chance to hold this little 3 month old. Just knowing he/she is alive was the best gift I received on my birthday last February.
My younger sister and I are dreaming again. It’s kind of funny to say, but it’s something I did a lot as a kid, but the older I get, the less I dream. A couple days ago she and I thought of something we’d like to do together in the next few years. It’s a business venture… something that may not become lucrative, but something I’d love, and I want to work at something I love. Even though there would be hard days, and days I feel like giving up, having the chance to go to work on good days and enjoy it so well it doesn’t even feel like work would be a dream come true. Don’t take me wrong, I like the job I have now, it’s quite enjoyable and I love the people I can work with, so I’m not looking for a way to get out of that. I’d like to work toward one of my own dreams though. If we decide to go for this venture and it takes off I’ll post more about it then; it would take up our lives for awhile so there would sure be plenty to write about! At this stage we’re pretty excited at the possibilities and we’re deciding on a realistic approach.
It’s nice to have something to dream about. Dreaming keeps life exciting and mysterious for me. It also keeps my mind busy. It isn’t enough just to dream though. Dreaming without ever doing, I think, is either a sign of indecision or fright, or sometimes both. I want the determination and courage to actually work for my dreams. If a dream fails, so be it. I want to move on, with new lessons learned, toward the next dream.
Speaking of dreaming makes me think of sleeping and reminds me how thankful I am for evening, darkness, and sleep. I get tired quickly and am so glad to rest when the day is done. Isn’t it frustrating though when you go to bed after an exhausting day and are unable to fall sleep? That’s happened to me quite a lot lately… but not last night. See, I have trouble with my skin sometimes, on and off for a few years, but it’s become worse this summer. Oddly, it gets pretty uncomfortable at night (or maybe I just notice it more then) and I lay there so tired, but can’t sleep. Last night I decided to finally try a prescription antihistamine the doctor gave me. Normally I avoid medications, but when I get super tired I become desperate. Well, it’s like I took a sleeping pill. I went right to sleep. Why I’m telling you all this, I don’t know. Maybe just to say I’m pretty thankful for sleep and I’m looking forward to it tonight. It’s good to think about what I’m thankful for. I’m trying to do that more than I used to. I heard it helps one’s attitude very much if everyday he or she thinks of three things to be thankful for. So today it’s sleep, the hope of cooler weather, and the chance to enjoy chocolate chip cookies at work (of which I had too many).
This was certainly a rambling post, but if anyone reached this point, I’d like to wish you a good evening and leave this bit of encouragement with you if you’re going through something rough. With Christ, the best is yet to come, and joy does come in the morning.